February 2012
198 posts
10 tags
This will probably be my last message to you all....
I’m not really sure what to say, because it seems I have said it all before.
I want to thank all of you who have been supportive when I needed it most. I wish that I could have turned out better, like if I were just a normal person. I am sorry for any time that you may have spend wondering and worrying, and if you have been doing that, I commend you. You all are brave souls. Unfortunately...
weakandlonely asked: Skype has messed up but I'm in bed now anyways :( <3 *hug*
zombiehearts asked: Hug for you <3
sandys-lullaby asked: How are you holding up? Still today?
Anonymous asked: please stay.
why-the-long-face-beautiful asked: Please don't hun. I love you. You are a beautiful wonderful person. I don't know how many people care about you but I know I do. Be strong for me, be strong for yourself.
edgarstreet asked: what if you just held on for a few more days, im not saying indefinitely, just a little longer, like i said before, maybe just until you finish your book. i dont believe that the world is ready to let go of you yet, even if you are ready to let go of it.
weakandlonely asked: STAY WITH ME :'( <3
weakandlonely asked: I <3 you! I want you to stay :'( I know it's selfish of me, but please...
weakandlonely asked: You are so wonderful and I'm so happy to have met you and I don't want you to go yet :'(
Have to finish prepping my pills and one longer letter to finish. If current plans go as planned, I should have one, if not two, good windows of opportunity tomorrow. I’m so ready for this. I’m so tired of hanging on.
zombiehearts asked: People that post anon hate are cowards. You're so much better than them.
im-just-a-little-unwell asked: Please don't listen to that anon, they're stupid, childish, pathetic, and cowardly. You're wonderful and amazing <3
weakandlonely asked: All those sending hate to this lovely, amazing girl, I only wanna say: fuck you. I don't know what you gain from sending hate, but it's disgusting. If you want to send hate, send it to me, and leave her alone.
Anonymous asked: I hope you get raped, then mauled, then eaten by a bear so then you can become the piece of shit you truly are.
Absolutely LOVE coming home to an inbox full of...
Dear Anon, I'm not looking for attention. Just...
Seriously. I had planned for one measly little hour to finally commit. I originally had planned for Friday, when I would have had two hours, but moved it to tomorrow. Ten minutes ago the boy decides to tell me that ‘oh yeah I work early tomorrow, too’. Which leaves me with zero free time. Unless I get up and do it in the middle of the night, or skip out on work early, but that’s...
What a lovely day.
Anonymous asked: im stealing it for a class. thanks for posting :3
Anonymous asked: That poem that you posted.. Is very good, and beautiful, im not too sure how to describe it; it was short but strikingly emotive.
zombiehearts asked: I really don't want to sound like a creeper, and I know I keep repeating myself. But I really, really just hope you can find happiness. And I don't know what you believe in, or even what I believe in anymore, but I hope one day maybe our lives will cross paths. Maybe in another life or whatever. And I'm sorry life dealt you such a shitty hand. You deserve so much more than this; you...
9 tags
Have some free time, gonna make a cocktail.
Alcohol-free, of course, because I’ve got a problem with alcohol abuse. Ugh.
My suicide drink! Oh yes, it will be wonderful. Roughly 100gm of Effexor, 3250mg of Nortriptyline (super toxic), some Amitriptylin for good measure, and probably add in two bottles of lithium, a bottle of Citalopram, bottle and a half of Lorazepam, and I should be all set.
And a noose, of course, in case my body...
“i’m strung up
and strung togther
by cosmetic wires
under my skin.
...”
– Ella Laighin agreatawakening.tumblr.com
Thank you, medications and illnesses, for...
I used to love sex. Now the thought of it literally puts me on edge, enough to where I feel like I might throw up. Granted I’m also just ashamed of my body, but that hasn’t really stopped me before.
All I know is my husband really doesn’t appreciate it. I wish I could explain it.
zombiehearts asked: What's wrong? If you don't mind being asked.
4 tags
I don't understand how I could have possibly...
You’re such a fuck and I hate you and I don’t ever want to think about you again. But you helped me ruin my life so much more than I already had, and I can’t get over that. I’ve been trying for so long. It hurts so much.
weakandlonely asked: It didn't let me answer the ask >.< but I <3 you too and I wish that as well. Would be amazing! I hope you will be at peace but I will miss you :'( I'm gonna cry now...
Anonymous asked: Weird how you keep putting off your suicide I had tried being supportive, caring and shit but you keep moving the date and crap, suicide isn't a game. You are becoming attention seeking
weakandlonely asked: Yes, you are! You really are meant to be here, otherwise you wouldn't be :(
f-atallyunique asked: i dont know you, you dont know me, but whatever your choice is, i wish you the best, i suffer from bipolar disorder and depression so i kind of know how your feeling. x0x0
weakandlonely asked: Don't ever leave! <3
weakandlonely asked: Please stay :(
endlessconflict asked: Hey, before you go, you should read the book 101 Alternatives to Suicide: For Teens, Freaks & Other Outlaws. I bought it and I think it's great.
I'm sick of working in a racist environment.
Fuck it, Monday will be my last day anyway.
Happy 500th post. Wahoo......
I should celebrate by… Cutting, not eating, oversleeping, and soon overdosing.
zombiehearts asked: I know I said it already, but I truly hope you find happiness in this. I'm not trying to encourage you. But I won't try to change your mind, either. I'd love to see you stay here a while longer, and see if things get better, but.. things don't always get better. I just hope this isn't a decision you will regret. I know people will miss you, and I will miss you, even though...
infinitefuckinglies asked: I probably sound really fucking stupid but why'd you put thank you on that?
Reblog if you would care if I committed tonight.
Anonymous asked: I may know little but you are amazing. You can't leave. ;( please.
